Monday, November 25, 2013

Interview with Humanburger Jones.

Full Name:
ryan kenneth jones

Do you have a nickname or what do your friends call you?
every has always called me jones

vancouver, bc canada

Current hometown:
cumberland, bc, canada

Favorite city and why?
i kind of love/hate all citys in the same way

april 25th 1983, i am 30 years of ago...

How would you describe yourself physically?
this is the opertunity to go, 'one sexy son of a bitch' but its too hard to keep a straight face saying that...

How would someone else describe you physically?
i guess you would have to ask someone else, lets hope they have the fuckin hots for me, knuk knuk knuk

The first thing people notice about you is…
hopefully my neon green shoe laces...

Hair Color/Eye Color/Race?
blond, green, im some kind of canadian...

Sexual orientation?
haha, whats that line dennis hopper says in blue velvet.. 'ill fuck anything that moves!!' ha haha

Religion, if any?

Are you superstitious at all? Any phobias?
theres a song about this i think, haha, not really, i have enough trouble fighting off crippling self doubt with out adding any phobias on top of that, hahah but i am terrified of horses... scary fucking shit man..
Really? Horses? What’s so scary about horses?
haha, im afriad of animals that possess the power to kick in my rib cage that spook on you if you move too quick around them and shit... fuckin' bad voodoo...

Do you smoke/drink?   If so, what?   Any bad habits?
almost 4 years no drinking, woot woot

Current occupation/Dream job:
to answer both questions at once, drawing for a living

What do you like to do when you’re not at work?
i usually like to work more actually... but i dig on skateboarding around town, metal concerts, cooking, working out, trying to have somewhat of a social life beyond work can be tricky for me at times thou, haha

What is your zombie outbreak survival plan?
go live on an island in the woods... oh wait a minute, i already did that...

Weapon of choice:
a paint brush

Do you have any special skills?

Did you go to college and, if so, what for?
hell no, i couldnt wait to get out of high school, the thought of going threw more schooling wanted to make me put a gun to my head...

If you went to college, did you manage to pay off your student loans?
haha, i've spent enough money on the school of hard knocks anyway, haha

Any pets?   If so, what are they and what are their names?
i used to have a 300gallon piranha tank...

What is your favorite animal?
sea creatures

Speaking of pets, any pet peeves?
shirly temple movies

Favorite/Least favorite Food:
i love home cooked meals, hate resturants...

What is your favorite quotation/motto/saying?
my friends tell me i have a lot of them, but the one ill stick with is, 'take no prisoners and take no shit'

What is the best thing that ever happened to you?
i get to work every day inking and painting

What is the worst thing that ever happened to you?
eh man, life is tough, dont dwell on that shit, move on and let it make you stronger, haha... rawk n roll!!

Ever had your heart broken? Is there a story worth telling behind your answer?
as frank zappa would say, broken hearts are for assholes, havent we all thou, thats what makes this life stuff so much fun. no one would take it seriously if there wasnt heart crushing things like that to drive you into the mud and dirt, all hurting you deep for years and years... i think its kinda cool...

Ever broken someone’s heart? Is there a story worth telling behind your answer?
im not sure, i try not to fuck around with people i know, relationships and family, but i fuck up like any normal human i suppose... i blow a lot of people off for work, im sure that isnt the warmest feeling i give out... but hey man, lifes fucking tough... suck it up... haha

What is the best thing you’ve ever done?
quiting all the shitty jobs i was working to become a full time artist...

What is the worst thing you’ve ever done?
hhmmm, not sure the worst, cuz im not really a shit disturber, but i wouldnt recommend getting high on mushrooms before a 14hour plane ride...
That sounds like just about the worst idea ever. I don’t even really like being around other people when I’m on psychedelics, much less on a motherfucking plane!
it was tricky to keep my cool, i still feel sorry for that poor gal i was bugging that sat behind me...

If you could kill one person, consequence free, who would it be and why?
nah, thats too much focus to give some asshole, its much better to let them live out their lives... thats much worse and crule... haha

What do you do?
i ink and paint fineart with lowbrow themes for a living, from heavy metal album art, snowboards to beer labels, i've done a good verity of different work over the years...

How did you get started doing what you do?
i started doing local metal band album, showflyer and tshirt art, then i kept gaining momentum finding other companies to work for and other bands, after awhile i could finally start to support myself on it, and no one could tell me to, 'get a real job' anylonger, haha



What is your advice to other people that want to get started doing what you do?
i'd suggest just doing it... haha, practice all the time, like, all the time, and go out and get yourself a job by sending emails to companys or bands or anything that you think you could apply your artwork, it is tricky to get that routine down of hunting down work, but its really no different than any other job, you apply, get the job, do the work, and get them bux... after you get the job, get into the habbit of working all the time, like, all the time...

What are some of the projects you’ve worked on/finished in the past? Give us a little history if you will.
I've worked in comics, magazines to album covers, from skateboards and snowboards to beer labels and advertisments... i started out doing metal album covers and really whatever i could hunt down, then slowly started working for bigger companys and such, crawling my way up the latter i guess, haha

What projects are you working on now?
i just finished another big bottle beer label for they are releaseing a line of 7 big bottles all with a wonder of the world theme, so i get to do a big 24x18inch painting for each one, they are great projects and come with a ton of work, i like that... always a metal band job in there too, doing a lot of work with vancouver metal band 'Nylithia' aswell, always good working with those fellahs...

What are you watching?
shit, nothing at the moment, what was the last flick i watched... 'Dust Devil' i think, which was directed by the same dude that did, 'hardware' which is a fav of mine, dustdevil had a cool mood, kind of rolled along like a ghost story, i really dug it...

What are you listening to?
The Allman Brothers Band - Trouble No More

What are you reading?
im actually a terrible reader, and dont read too much at all really, i read a lot of comics thou, thats about as inteletual as i get i guess, haha... i like cook books, haha

Favorite author/book?
i have a thwack of hp lovecraft audio books that i have been going threw systematically, so right now im really into those...
I went through an H. P. Lovecraft audio book phase too, but mostly they just made me want to do a re-recording of his entire body of work. Don’t get me wrong, some of them were great, but some of them were unlistenable, so I think it would be a benevolent thing to do one solid recording of his entire work. I’ve got a great voice actor in mind for it, but he’s a busy guy and I’m a busy guy and I’m trying to build up a bankroll so I can move the fuck out of here so we probably won’t get around to doing it, but it’s nice to think about every now and then. Plus unless I can do a crowd-funding campaign to fund it, it’s not worth doing because I can’t afford the time and effort to do something on that scale for free when I’m already behind on other paying projects.
haha, story of my life man... i've always thought there wasnt enough time in the day aswell, haha

Favorite band/song?
thats a tricky one, i go from classic rock to grind core, so its hard to pick a fav, been rawkin a ton of thin lizzy lately, i been throwing that new 'toxic holocaust' cd on a lot thou... its awesome...

Least favorite band/song?
music is great...

Desert Island Music/Movies/Books: You know the deal. Five of each.
haha, maybe some how to movie or book on survival or boat building maybe, haha,
Alright. That’s it. Everybody thinks they’re a fucking comedian and tosses in some glib snarky answer about “How To Survive On A Desert Island For Dummies” so I’m taking it out of the survey. I mean, really, is everyone so fucking concrete that they really truly can’t understand the concept of a motherfucking metaphor? Sheesh!
ah haha, the straw the broke the camels back... eh man, its my gosh darn rootin' tootin' interview and i can make all the snarky and half witted jokes i want to, haha, ill stoop to bad puns and shit man, i dont give a fuck!! Haha
It’s nothing personal, I assure you. I get jokes. But apparently no one ever reads anyone else’s interview and is, like, “Oh, someone already did that.”. Ah well…
If you could do anything other than what you do now, what would you do?
fuck that shit, artwork for life y'allz...

What’s the best and worst job you’ve ever had?
best job is the one i have now, the worst job i had was i think starting at this warehouse at 4am... the cops would always stop me going to work on my bike cuz riding to work at 3am in vancouver you look like someone breaking into cars, i would unload semi truck trailers by hand, it was usually boxes of manderan oranges... but i've worked in all sorts of insulation, concrete, outside in the rain cold and muddy kind of jobs... nothing like doing shit like that that makes you want to become an artist, haha...

Are there any questions that I didn’t ask that you wished I had asked that you would like to answer now?
yes, but im glad you didnt bring up those imbarassing questions, its been a few years now, im terribly sorry and i think we just have to put that dark stuff behind us and best to just move forward, ya know... knuk knuk knuk

Got any questions for me?
sure, got any crazy life revelations you've stumbled upon, or some words of wisdom threw doing what you love in life? shit aint easy, what are your tricks? haha
Some people think I’m smart. But I always say, “If I’m so fucking smart, then why aren’t I rich?” I’m just figuring it out one day at a time like everyone else. I hope to finally be able to ditch shift-work and support myself with my writing soon. I just checked in on my first novel which I published under an assumed name because it is a truly vile piece of work and it has a paperback and nine Kindle copies sold, so that was cool. But it’s only about $20 in royalties, which is nice, but not the kind of income I can support myself with since the book’s been out a week or so already. But hopefully it takes off and I can just write full-time which would be my dream job, I suppose.
i believe man!! its amazing what happens when you just follow through with things like that, i am no fucking smarty pants for sure, really im just good at closing my eyes and pulling the trigger i guess, which got me this far... haha

Closing questions / summary / and thanks:
thanks so much for the interview homie, i wish you all the very best and keep on a rawkin and a rollin, to the people that have been following and supporting my artwork, i give such a big sticky and gooey thank you it starts to become just that little bit awkward, you know what i'm talkin' about, wink wink... couldnt do it without all the props, so thanks for reading threw this, and always more art to come, just for you... so fuckin eh! do what makes you happy, and fuck everything else... leave that shit in the dust where you found it and move towards that shiney bright future of yours... rawk n roll

Pitch parade:
Give me all of your links for things you want to promote.   All of them.

About the Interviewee:
eh, i'm Jones from, i ink and paint heavy metal horror art, comission work from beer labels to snowboards, and comic work for a living. I love black and white inking but these days i've been swinging over to full colour acrylics and they have been capturing all my interest for the last few years. i live up in canada on vancouver island, and pretty much just haul myself up and work all the time, i really love it and its good to stay productive and it keeps me out of trouble, haha...
About the Interviewer:
Scott Lefebvre has probably read everything you've read and can write about whatever you want him to write about.
Mostly because when he was grounded for his outlandish behavior as a hyperactive school child, the only place he was allowed to go was the public library.
His literary tastes were forged by the works of Helen Hoke, Alvin Schwartz and Stephen Gammell, Ray Bradbury, Richard Matheson, Stephen King, Clive Barker, Edgar Allan Poe, and H. P. Lovecraft.
He is the author of Spooky Creepy Long Island and a contributing author to Forrest J. Ackerman’s Anthology of the Living Dead, Fracas: A Collection of Short Friction, The Call of Lovecraft, and Cashiers du Cinemart.
His reviews have been published by a variety of in print and online media including Scars Magazine, Icons of Fright, Fatally Yours and Screams of Terror, and he has appeared in Fangoria, Rue Morgue and HorrorHound Magazine.
He is the Assistant Program Director for The Arkham Film Society and produces Electronic Music under the names Master Control and LOVECRAFTWORK.
He is currently working on a novel-length expansion of a short-story titled, "The End Of The World Is Nigh", a crowd-funded, crowd-sourced, post-apocalyptic, zombie epidemic project.
Check out the blog for the book here:
Check out the Facebook Fan Page for the project here:
Check his author profile at:
Follow him at GoodReads here:
Check out his publishing imprint Burnt Offerings Books here:
And here:
Check out his electronic music here:
And here:
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Check out his IMDB profile here:
Follow his Twitter here: or @TheLefebvre
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Join the group for The Arkham Film Society here:
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